Never-ending

Growing up, I used to watch Mexican soap operas. And I loved that each novela would have a grand finale. It wouldn’t go on and on and on like American soap operas. (How long has General Hospital been on?) Of course there were times that I’d get sad when a novela would end–it was so good! But I appreciated the fact that they would give the viewer closure by having an end.

I *loved* watching this actress growing up 😀

What does this all have to do with running?

I don’t want BQ training to be my General Hospital. 

While I love training, and get legitimately sad when it’s over, I reeeally don’t want training to Boston Qualify to be never-ending. Please Lord let there be an end (and with good results LOL)!!

I’m always excited to start a new training cycle and I’m excited this time too, but…

REAL TALK: Sometimes I wish that BQ training could’ve been a continuation of NYC Marathon training–I felt so confident and in it then. I honestly think it was because I knew deep down inside I could get my sub 4 hour goal, despite it requiring a 45 minute improvement. I wasn’t scared of the “end” of that cycle. I was excited. I knew I could reach my goal.

I take comfort in the “known” which is why I think this particular training cycle scares me so much. I don’t know if I can reach my goal. I don’t know when this BQ training cycle will end. That confidence I had going into and training for NYC Marathon is not here with this BQ training. I’m trying. I really am–to be optimistic, and tell myself that with hard work and commitment it can be possible. But the high expectations of this particular end is both exciting and terrifying.

Does that make sense? Does any of this make sense?

I love challenge. I love taking risks. I even like being scared. As far as running is concerned, this will be my biggest challenge, my biggest risk, and the scariest thing I’ve ever attempted.

Here’s hoping it doesn’t become a never-ending training cycle! 😀

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10 responses

  1. Dude, I totally get it. I wanted my last marathon to be BQ, but alas, it didn’t happen for me. Don’t know when it’s going to happen. Like you, I know it’ll happen one day, but I just don’t know when.

    • It’s that unknown, that is so freaking scary. I keep saying how I want to give it all I got so that I only have to go through it once, but if I’m being honest, I haven’t so far. I could be doing more. I know that a BQ attempt requires more. Sometimes it’s easier to self-sabatoge, LOL!!

  2. Get out of your head! You’re putting too much pressure on yourself. Enjoy the ride and we know what the ultimate goal is, but when it’s all said and done all you can do is give it your best. Focus on what you can control. Each run leading up to your marathon. Some will be great, some won’t. Come race, trust the training. Remember, running is mental and it starts now.

    You’ve got this! One step at a time (pun, intended!)!

  3. Well………….okay. Let me think. I feel like since I’m nearly 40 and have been doing this running thing for 20 years, that I qualify myself to just give you some un-asked for wisdom. HA! So…. when I qualified for Boston, it took me a few tries. Then I ran Boston, and after it was done I was like NOW WHAT. It was very anti-climactic and all over way too soon. It’s but a blip on my timeline of life and I wish it had lasted longer than it had. The ride to Boston is FUN! As a running community, we’re all in this together and we love participating in everyone else’s training and get inspired by workouts and races, the good ones AND the bad ones. So……. ya. Make your OWN Mexican soap opera, and let it be as long as it needs to be to be perfect for your life. ❤

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